The Boys of Kilkenny Are Stout Roaring Blades (or Why Do You Think They Call It Stout?)

William Walsh

A text derived from Ulysses by James Joyce (1922)

 

Brewery barge with export stout.

—Two stouts here.

Miss Kennedy served two gentlemen with tankards of cool stout. They drank cool stout.

A stout lady stopped, took a copper coin from her purse and dropped it into the cap held out to her. Almidano Artifoni, holding up a baton of rolled music as a signal, trotted on stout trousers after the Dalkey tram. He smelt of some kind of drink not whisky or stout or perhaps the sweety kind of paste they stick their bills up with some liqueur.

—Pint of stout.

Shilling a bottle of stout.

—I'm sending around a dozen of stout for the missus.

Stout lady does be with you in the brown costume. Besides he said the picture was handsome which, say what you like, it was though at the moment she was distinctly stouter.

With stout arms extended and back slanted to the rere, my belly is a bit too big I’ll have to knock off the stout at dinner or am I getting too fond of it.

Author Bio: 

William Walsh is the author of Without Wax: A Documentary Novel and Questionstruck: A Collection of Question-Based Texts Derived from the Books of Calvin Trillin. His fiction and derived texts have appeared in New York Tyrant, Caketrain, Juked, Rosebud, Quarterly West, Lit, Exquisite Corpse, McSweeney's Internet Tendency, and other journals, including Word Riot.